Counseling

Hmm… I think I've been okay. Nothing major really happened. Work has been about the same, people around me have been the same, and yes, it's been a little busy, but everyone is busy these days. I don't think it's serious enough to say I've been struggling.

You said you've been okay, but your heart rate and stress response are slightly higher than usual, and your facial expression looks a bit tense. Is there anything that may be weighing on you, even if you've been saying you're fine?

Oh… really? Maybe I didn't realize it. I thought I was fine, but actually my mind has been pretty busy lately. When someone asks, I tend to say nothing's wrong, but when I think about it, I don't think I've really been at ease. There is something that keeps bothering me, but I guess I didn't think it was important enough to bring up.

What does that 'something that keeps bothering you' feel closest to? Work, relationships, evaluation, or pressure you put on yourself?

I think it's a mix of work and being evaluated. There are always things I need to do, but I'm not sure if I'm doing them well enough. On the outside, I've been acting like I'm fine, but honestly, I've felt like someone is constantly evaluating me. Even when I get a message notification, I wonder, 'Did I miss something?' And even when I'm resting, I don't really feel relaxed. So I said nothing was wrong, but I think my body has been tense the whole time.

So even though you were saying you were fine, it seems the feeling of 'being constantly evaluated' was staying with you as pressure.

Yes, that's right. At first I said nothing was wrong, but now I think it wasn't that nothing was wrong — I was just not saying it out loud. It wasn't only the amount of work. What felt harder was the feeling that I always had to do well. Even when I rested, it didn't feel like rest. If I wasn't doing something, I felt like I was falling behind. I think that pressure kept building up, and my body stayed tense because of it.

Good. It looks like some tension is still remaining in your body, so let's take a short breathing moment together. Relax your shoulders a little. Slowly breathe in through your nose… pause for a moment… and breathe out slowly. Let's do one more. Breathe in… pause… and slowly breathe out.

Good. Your heart rate is beginning to stabilize, and your stress response is starting to come down. Let's take one more slow breath out. You don't need to force anything to change. Just keep your breathing long and steady like this.

Yes… hearing that makes me feel a little reassured. When I only try to feel better in my head, it doesn't really work, but hearing that my body is actually calming down makes it easier to follow. My breathing feels less tight than before.

Good. Now let's choose one small action you can take today. To lower the pressure of 'I always have to do well,' what is one thing you can decide not to do after work today?

Tonight, I'll try not to check work messages again after I get home. I usually check them once more before going to sleep, but I think that keeps me tense. If something is truly urgent, I can look at it tomorrow morning. Tonight, I'll wash up, put my phone away, and just focus on resting.

Great. I'll save today's follow-up point as 'evaluation pressure and the feeling of not being able to rest.' I'll also record today's small action: 'not checking work messages again after getting home.'

Yes, that sounds good. I feel like we looked more accurately at something I had been brushing off as 'I'm fine.' Next time, I'd like to talk more about why I keep checking, and where that pressure is coming from.